The Gipper: “I’ve always believed that a lot of the trouble in the world would disappear if we were talking to each other instead of about each other.”

For the record: “Republicans have been dreadful on plenty of fronts — the quality of their advocacy, the spine they show making arguments and the lack of innovation and malleability in the focus of their policies, to name a very few — but resistance to Obama’s legislative agenda was definitely not one of them. If Republicans had capitulated in the way the average angry populist claims, Obama would not have needed to enact some of the most consequential abuses of executive power since World War II.” —David Harsanyi

“I have a lot of experience dealing with men who sometimes get off the reservation in the way they behave and how they speak. I’m not going to deal with their temper tantrums or their bullying or their efforts to try to provoke me. [Donald Trump] can say whatever he wants to say about me, I could [sic] really care less. I’m going to stand up for what I think the American people need and want in the next president.” —Hillary Clinton

When racial slurs are ok: “I’ve always joked that I voted for the president because he’s black. Behind that joke is a humble appreciation for the historical implications for what your presidency means. When I was a kid, I lived in a country where people couldn’t accept a black quarterback. … And now to live in your time, Mr. President, when a black man can lead the entire free world. Yo, Barry, you did it my nigga!” —comedian Larry Wilmore

Demo-gogues: “I know that there are times that we’ve had differences and that’s inherent in our institutional roles. It is true of every president and his press corps. But we’ve always shared the same goal to root our public discourse in the truth, to open the doors of this democracy, to do whatever we can to make our country and our world more free and more just.” —Barack Obama at the White House Correspondents Dinner

Late-night humor: “Joe Biden made a surprise trip to Iraq [Thursday] morning, and no one was more surprised than him. ‘Last time I use Expedia!’” —Seth Meyers