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April 28, 2017

Friday Short Cuts

Maxine Waters implies Rep. Jason Chaffetz is involved in Russia collusion.

Insight: “Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven’t been taxed before.” —Art Buchwald (1925-2006)

For the record: “General Flynn was a career military officer who maintained a high-level security clearance throughout his career in the military. His clearance was last reissued by the Obama administration in 2016 with full knowledge of his activities that occurred in 2015.” —Sean Spicer

Reality sets in: “I loved my previous life. I had so many things going. This is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier.” —Donald Trump

Non Compos Mentis: “There are those who think that [Rep. Jason Chaffetz], in some ways, have [sic] some connections to what is going on in the Ukraine and perhaps in Russia itself and knows something about all of this. I don’t really know. I can’t say, but he’s strange in the way that he’s conducting himself.” —Maxine Waters

Alpha Jackass: “Where’s Melania going to go if we don’t have any sanctuary cities?” —The View’s Whoopi Goldberg

Friendly fire: “What is the Democratic agenda? What does the party have to offer besides disunity, obstruction, incoherence, obsession, and obliviousness? They haven’t rallied behind a plan to fix Obamacare or an alternative to the president’s tax proposal. They seem dead set against enforcement of immigration laws, they seem opposed to any restrictions on abortion, they seem as eager as ever to regulate firearms and carbon dioxide. It’s hard to detect a consensus beyond that.” —Matthew Continetti

Late-night humor: “According to reports, a group of buyers led by Jeb Bush and Derek Jeter has won the auction to purchase the Miami Marlins. Jeter is excited to get back to baseball, while Jeb is excited to get back to losing.” —Seth Meyers

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