Upright: “Much has been made … of Louis C.K.‘s public apology for exposing himself and masturbating in front of women. While most of the attention has been focused on the imbalance of power … very little has been said about his rather bizarre behavior and its origins. … Some men have become so used to watching pornography that it is easier for them to handle matters on their own. These men don’t need actual physical contact with a woman — having her sit on the other side of the room works just fine. … Even in a culture where consent is the only consideration in sexual encounters, it is still useful for men and women to have reasonable expectations of one another. And just as most men probably don’t want to be compared to porn stars, most women don’t want to be treated like them.” —Independent Women’s Forum senior fellow Naomi Schaefer Riley

For the record: “I absolutely think the protests are so upsetting, and I blame the commissioner. I know people are going to be angry when I say it, but he should have stopped the protests at the very beginning. … Our flag is very special, and black lives matter, but what we should do is go to Washington after the season and protest there instead. We have young men and women fighting for the flag. And we have to respect the White House.” —former NFL star Herschel Walker

D'oh! “There was nothing fast and easy about [negotiations with Ireland in the '90s]. [Bill] didn’t Tweet about it. He got to work about it and he actually got it done.” —Hillary Clinton (Twitter launched in 2006.)

Braying Jackass: “I’m trying to make up for the fact that I think I was too tough on [Bill] Clinton.” —MSNBC’s Chris Matthews reflecting on the change of heart other media figures are having re: Clinton’s sex scandals

Alpha Jackass: “It’s one of the most dangerous times in modern history. I think that there have always been voices in our country — and particularly in the 19th and 20th century in Europe — that have always tried to take advantage of pain and change. Do you think [Trump] really cares about the kids I grew up with in Scranton, Pennsylvania as far as their economic well-being?” —Joe Biden

And last… “Radio host Leeann Tweeden came forward and said Sen. Al Franken groped her without her consent. And she posted a photo as evidence. In fact, it’s so bad Franken’s already a front runner for president in 2020.” —Jimmy Fallon