Insight: “The knowledge of the world is only to be acquired in the world, and not in a closet.” —Philip Dormer Stanhope (1694-1773)

Upright: “It starts with how you raise your children. If a young man doesn’t have a father figure, he’ll go find a father figure. So, you know, I can’t blame the system. It’s unfortunate that we make such easy work for them.” —Denzel Washington

Translation: Guilty as charged: “I can’t say that [butt groping] hasn’t happened. In crowded chaotic situations, I can’t say I haven’t done that. I am very sorry if these women experienced that.” —Al Franken

Braying Jenny: “New details today on the incident that left Senator Rand Paul with six broken ribs — this might be one of my favorite stories.” —MSNBC’s Kasie Hunt

Non Compos Mentis: “The real culprit of the climate crisis is not any particular form of consumption, production or regulation but rather the very way in which we globally produce, which is for profit rather than for sustainability. So long as this order is in place, the crisis will continue and, given its progressive nature, worsen. This is a hard fact to confront. But averting our eyes from a seemingly intractable problem does not make it any less a problem. It should be stated plainly: It’s capitalism that is at fault.” —Arizona State University professor Benjamin Y. Fong in The New York Times

Right for the wrong reasons: “I did think [Hillary Clinton] was very, very dangerous.” —actress and Bernie Sanders fangirl Susan Sarandon

Irony alert: “This is the core threat to our democracy. The rural minority … have and will continue to have disproportionate power over the urban majority.” —MSNBC’s Joy Reid (Our Republic was established so that the urban majority wouldn’t have disproportionate power over the rural minority.)

And last… “On Monday, GQ political correspondent Keith Olbermann … suddenly announced his retirement from the world of political commentary. … Already, speculation has begun that there is another reason Olbermann is stepping down. Perhaps it’s to take care of his cats. But we’ll soon find out.” —Ben Shapiro