Upright: “Donald Trump did not create distrust of the media, distrust of the media helped create Donald Trump.” —Mollie Hemingway

The man doth protest too much: “I’ll say that the press is not the enemy of the people. And, you know, I think maybe we should make some bumper stickers, make some buttons. You know, maybe we should go out on Pennsylvania Avenue like these folks who chant ‘CNN Sucks’ and ‘Fake News.’ Maybe … all journalists should go out on Pennsylvania Avenue and chant, ‘We’re not the enemy of the people.’ Because I’m tired of this.” —CNN’s Jim Acosta (And we’re just as tired of you.)

Braying Jackass: “The president would be a monarch if Brett Kavanaugh becomes a Supreme Court justice.” —Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-CT)

Friendly fire: “Because I am a liberal Democrat and feminist, I expect my friends on the left will criticize me for speaking up for Kavanaugh. But we all benefit from having smart, qualified and engaged judges on our highest court, regardless of the administration that nominates them. … Democrats should quit attacking Kavanaugh — full stop. It is unbecoming to block him simply because they want to, and they risk alienating intelligent people who see the obvious: He is the most qualified conservative for the job.” —Lisa Blatt in Politico

Braying Jenny: “Here’s a simple inconvenient truth opponents of choice don’t want to acknowledge — for a lot of women, abortion makes their future families possible. … I’m a mother who supports choice and who wants my teenage daughters to have the freedom to choose when and if they have children. This means access to birth control, morning after pills and abortion. Because I love them more than anything in the universe and I want them to be educated, independent, and healthy. People who want to protect their daughters are called mothers. And people who are frightened of that prospect are called misogynists.” —Salon’s Mary Elizabeth Williams

And last… “It is absolutely vital for every American to watch CNN for five minutes a day. Why? Because it will give you a good idea of what it’s going to be like when you have a stroke.” —comedian Lewis Black