A blind squirrel finds a nut: “I think there was a fundamental difference between 16-year-old Eric and 18-year-old Eric. … If you’re able to serve in the armed services, you know, potentially give your life for your country, I think that is a really good demarcation line. And at that point I think you ought to have the ability … to vote.” —former Attorney General Eric Holder

Race bait: “Exactly when did you think America was great? It certainly wasn’t when people were enslaved. It certainly wasn’t when women didn’t have the right to vote. It certainly wasn’t when the LGBT community was denied the rights to which it was entitled.” —Eric Holder

Braying Jenny: “We just haven’t even seen the Mueller report, and we don’t expect to accept just the attorney general’s interpretation of it. A little bit arrogant of him to think that that would be the case.” —House Speaker Nancy Pelosi

Braying Jenny II: “I’m so proud of the work of [House Intelligence Committee] Chairman Adam Schiff, in stark contrast to the irresponsible, almost criminal, behavior of the previous chair of the committee. … I think [Republicans are] just scaredy-cats. They just don’t know what to do.” —Nancy Pelosi

Oh good grief: “It took [William Barr] only two days to write a four-page summary of an investigation that was conducted over the course of two years, seemingly around the clock. So it calls into question the integrity of the document that he submitted.” —Sen. Kamala Harris

Delusions: “[The Mueller report] establishes, I hope, to all people, no matter where they are on the spectrum, that the FBI is not corrupt, not a nest of vipers and spies, but an honest group of people trying to find out what is true. And that’s what you see here.” —former FBI Director James Comey (He’s right about the vast majority of agents, but deceitfully wrong about his own leadership.)

The BIG Lie: “One real threat is the impacts of climate change on our safety. … Cyber-security is a real threat. … Mass gun violence … [is] a real threat. What’s not a real threat to the safety and security of Americans is the southwest border.” —Janet Napolitano

Alpha Jackass: “In America, we have in the aggregate a mass shooting every day because dozens of people are shot and killed. I am frustrated with politicians who all the best they can muster is to give thoughts and prayers. Enough of that. Enough of that.” —Sen. Cory Booker

Pivoting: “I don’t know all the details in the prosecutor’s decision [to drop the Jussie Smollett charges]. I know that’s going to come out. But what we’ve got to know is that this is happening in a larger context where hate crimes in this country are on a rise. Where white-supremacist violence is on the rise. In fact, if you look at the majority of terrorist attacks since 9/11, the majority of them have been done by homegrown, right-wing extremist groups, and the majority of those have been white-supremacist groups.” —Cory Booker

And last… “I wouldn’t mind them dropping charges against Smollett if the condition was that he had to publicly admit his guilt. That would be a worse penalty than jail time for a narcissistic liar like him. The fact that they allowed him to walk free AND play the martyr is the real travesty.” —Matt Walsh