Stephen Guy Hardin / April 15, 2011

Red Bull Journalism


So, I’m watching the video of a Canadian reporter covering the latest bit of silliness from the front lines of our latest Mideast military fiasco, this time in Libya. Well, he said it was Libya, but considering the well earned reputation of the main stream Liberal media, he could be reporting from the beach volleyball sand pit of the Hilton in the Grand Caymans.

But, I digress.


Even on my best days I can be verbally challenged, but even at my highest state of inebriation, I could put together what passed for a few logical sentences. But I’m not a highly overpaid, ego inflated, self righteous gas bag.


Well, I’m not highly overpaid.


Toronto’s Global News swiftly reported that Mark McAllister had suffered a minor medical issue and went on to say:

"While on the air during the 6:00 PM News Hour broadcast on Monday, March 21, Global Toronto reporter Mark McAllister suffered a minor medical issue causing him to experience a moment of disorientation. Paramedics were immediately called to the scene, where Mark was fully checked out and is feeling better. As a precaution, Mark will be pursuing this matter with his own doctor.“


Though no accurate transcript could be found of Mr. McAllisters verbal meltdown, after all it’s pretty difficult to transcribe baby talk, the general consensus is he was babbling like Joe Biden, before he gets his Xanax and vodka magical morning elixir. The actual video is still available on You Tube and is highly entertaining. I highly recommend it, especially after a couple of drinks.


About a month ago L.A. Entertainment reporter Serene Branson had a similar gobbledygook episode, while reporting live at the Emmy Awards, though in all fairness, Mark’s Libya gibberish fest was much better. While Ms. Branson and Mr. McAllisters respective brain farts were written off as various medical issues, I feel we are seeing the beginning of a new wave of journalism.


New wave, indeed.


With the ever growing and ever crowded field of digital journalists popping up from every major and minor cable, satellite, Internet and social network around the globe, the competition for good stories must be harrowing, but worse still must be the competition for reporters. In the old days, when there were only three major American television networks, a large pool of ‘reporters in training’ allowed for a reasonable assurance of quality and professionalism, if not political objectiveness.


As with most things in life, mass production lowers quality. This fact is especially relevant when dealing with masses of drooling Liberal journalists striving to remake the world in the image of Marx, Lenin and Lennon.

I’ve heard unconfirmed rumors that some major news networks are recruiting local high school students to be sent overseas to cover the ever growing number of American battle fronts. Considering the nature of the Liberal dominated public school system in this country, this is pretty disheartening news indeed.


So, with the quality of reporters slipping perilously below the drainage pond level and the ever increasing pressure to put out stories, as fast and furious as inhumanly possible, it’s not surprising to see a couple of on air reporters have total meltdowns. I’m confident it’s just the beginning, as the demands for new faces and new stories increase at a frenzied, manic pace.


The frail psyche of the modern digital journalist is being forced to resort to any available form of medication and supplement to maintain their edge, often with hilarious results. The almost psychopathic drive to get the latest story and beat the ever approaching deadline can force the most stable mind to the edge of instability. Add in the need to distort the truth into a Liberal-Progressive-Socialist template … well, the pressure must be unbearable.


Speaking for myself, I am looking forward to seeing more and more of these self loathing, monomaniacal, Botox poisoned, anti-American talking heads melt down on live TV. Perhaps the age of yellow journalism has passed, but I am looking forward with gleeful delight to the coming age of Red Bull journalism.

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