NEW YORK CITY — Shortly after leaving the courthouse, former President Donald Trump announced the release of an ultra-exclusive “Trump On Trial” NFT, to be listed at $83.3 million.

“It’s so exclusive, tremendously exclusive, we’re practically giving it away,” said President Trump. “I didn’t know how much it was worth, I knew it was a big deal, very huge. Soon as I came out of court today my lawyer said this NFT is worth $83.3 million, which seems like a great price, incredible really.”

According to sources, the NFT will be an image of Trump in the courtroom listening as the verdict in the defamation trial was being read. “I think the image completely captures the spirit of the moment,” said a source inside the courtroom. “You can see Trump’s confusion as he tells the judge it’s impossible he lost because his lawyer is so attractive. There’s Trump’s elation that having been found guilty, he can now legally call E. Jean Carroll any terrible name he can think of. You can almost hear Trump giggle as he checks his phone and sees his polling go up with another guilty verdict. It’s an amazing NFT.”

At publishing time, the judge in the case had reportedly denied Trump’s generous offer to give Ms. Carroll the NFT as payment in full.

From our friends at The Babylon Bee.