Right Analysis   /   Humor
The Babylon Bee / July 16, 2026

10 Rejected Titles for Biden’s New Memoir

Judging from the list, there were a lot of great titles to choose from.

Nate Jackson / July 15, 2026

A Time for Choosing: When Should It Be Morning in America?

Newly passed House legislation would allow year-round daylight saving time. Will the Senate follow suit and stop the lunacy of the biannual time change?

The Babylon Bee / July 15, 2026

Megyn Kelly Now Claims She’s Never Heard of a ‘Candace Owens’

“If Candace Owens is a face cream, tell me more. Maybe they would sponsor my show.”

The Babylon Bee / July 13, 2026

Newsom: ‘We Finna Teach Da Homies to Talk Black English Yo’

“Because we want every child to learn to communicate with our black brothers and sisters, ya dig?”

The Babylon Bee / July 10, 2026

Sunny Hostin Flees in Terror After Seeing Pillsbury American Flag Cookie Dough

“Help! I’m in danger! The flag, it tried to hurt me. There were stars, and stripes, and a fat white boy.”

The Babylon Bee / July 9, 2026

10 Best Candidates to Replace Graham Platner

This is one impressive list. How can the Democrats choose just one?

The Babylon Bee / July 8, 2026

8 Simple, Foolproof Ways to Test an Athlete’s Gender

The hard work begins to identify the trans athletes and ensure that women’s sports are protected from men forever.

The Babylon Bee / July 7, 2026

Dems Wishing There Had Been Some Sort of Sign That Platner Was a Bad Person

“It’s always the ones you least suspect, you know?”

The Babylon Bee / July 6, 2026

7 Tips for Europeans to Stay Cool Without Air Conditioning

Build a wooden ship and sail to America: Discover the strange, air-conditioned New World for the glory of Spain.

The Babylon Bee / July 2, 2026

In Most Exciting Moment in History of WNBA, Woman Points at Other Woman

“Notice the extension of the index finger here,” one analyst explained. “This is elite pointing. You simply don’t see fundamentals like this every day.”

The Babylon Bee / July 1, 2026

Supreme Court Rules Any Baby Born at Olive Garden Is an Italian Citizen

“This ruling upholds many years of settled law,” Chief Justice John Roberts said.

The Babylon Bee / June 30, 2026

Woman Rules It’s Okay to Be Late

Justice Barrett cited legal expert and country music artist Shania Twain in her ruling.

The Babylon Bee / June 29, 2026

Democrats Furious Trump Would Make Haitians Leave Most Racist Country on Earth

“These dear Haitians will be forced to leave this oppressive, awful society filled with racism and inequality.”

The Washington Stand / June 26, 2026

Kenny Chesney Joins Growing Club of Stars Who Refuse to Use Their Platforms for Politics

“I’ve never [seen] it to be my place to use my stage or platform … to tell people how to think or how to vote.”

The Babylon Bee / June 26, 2026

In Powerful Act of Protest, Liberals Begin Adding Algae to Drinking Water

The trend gained momentum after activists began posting videos under the hashtag #StandWithTheScum.

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