October 2, 2024

A Different Kind of Trump Rap Sheet

There’s still time for Trump-supporting rappers to unveil at least a mild October surprise.

By Noel S. Williams

Many musicians who are keen to take money from MAGA supporters are balking at President Trump using their music at some of his rallies. Some have even sued the campaign, but there are other famous artists who are all in with Trump. It’s time they step up to the recoding microphone.

A disproportionate number of musical artists supporting Trump seem to specialize in the rap and hip-hop genres, including Azalia Banks, DaBaby, Kayne West, Kodak Black, Lil Pump, Sexyy Red, and Waka Flocka.

Fortunately, I’m unfamiliar with them, though Kanye West’s name rings a bell. Some of their lyrics would be inappropriate for a family audience, let alone a campaign rally. Nevertheless, profanities and vulgarities aside, they’re apparently clever and creative artists who’ve earned cachet with an important voting bloc — one that Trump courts.

Some rappers say they wrote big hits in 10 minutes — perhaps we can add a couple of days for hip-hop “perfection.” That shouldn’t be a stretch for Lil Pump, Waka Flocka, et al., especially when leveraging Google’s AI-powered tools for rappers, writers, and wordsmiths. There, they can harness AI to create metaphors, similes, wordplay, and punchlines for their raps.

After jamming out a catchy one, it will have to be produced and recorded, which could be accomplished in about a week. Distribution and promotion can be streamlined through streaming platforms and social media.

There are only a few weeks until the election (early voting notwithstanding), but there’s still time for the Trump-supporting rappers to unveil at least a mild October surprise — a MAGA mega hit to accompany and introduce him on any future voter outreach events to groups the Dems take for granted.

I even started the first stanza for them, taking only 10 minutes:

Trump’s the MAGA man, you dig?
Now get down now and boogey-woogie
Laffin’ Kam is a pretentious prig
She got no jibe, her vibes be moody

Chorus:

Hey yeah, get your groove on
Cut the jive talk, move on

Clearly, I’m not immersed in hip-hop culture, nor do I enjoy a poetic nature, but imagine what the real Trump-supporting rappers could quickly conjure up.

Who needs Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, or whomever else appeals to the misguided teenyboppers and their voting-eligible friends? They were likely going for Kamala anyway. Besides, polls show the endorsement may have backfired, as only 6% of respondents said they were more likely to vote for Harris, compared to 13% who were less likely.

Nothing will replace Bruce Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA,” but a MAGA mega rap will broaden our reach to important constituents.

Please, get the “Flocka” in the studio. It’s time for a different kind of Trump rap sheet. That’s a wrap.

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