10 Undeniable Reasons Communist China Is Way Better Than America
The president is the most handsome fellow in the world and does not look anything like Winnie the Pooh.
Glory to glorious leader, President Xi!
If you listen to the news media, it’s clear that America has become the most horrible and oppressive country in the world, which means people should be looking for a better place to live, like Communist China.
The Babylon Bee has compiled the following list of examples of how China is way better than living in America:
Zero global pandemics started in the last 4 years: Wow, 4 years in a row is impressive.
Total freedom of speech from within your 4x4 confinement cell: You can literally say anything you want in there. Very generous.
There are a million places to learn Kung Fu: Everyone in China is a martial arts master.
The government will harvest all your extra, unnecessary organs for free: Convenient.
Gay characters are all edited out of movies: The way God intended it.
The President is the most handsome fellow in the world and does not look anything like Winnie the Pooh: He looks like Robert Redford, only even more handsome. And he’s so, so smart. Trump must be very jealous.
Nobody has to deal with the hassle of elections: Just watch the state-run news to find out who your new leaders are. Much more relaxing.
They have gongs: You bang on them and they make a huge noise. Do you have a gong? Didn’t think so.
Slave labor keeps production costs super low: As long as you’re ok being the slave.
Authentic Chinese food: Available to everyone with a social credit score of at least 5,000.
Don’t act like the reasons listed above don’t have you packing your bags to move to China.
From our friends at The Babylon Bee.
