Conservatively Speaking
Sometimes, when we’re out in public and I begin talking about the personalities and policies of various liberals, my wife Yvonne will start looking around to see if anyone is staring or throwing daggers in my direction. Such is life for a conservative in Los Angeles.
I’m sure that in other parts of the country – Texas in particular, if I may judge by my email – people on the right can speak more freely. What that suggests to me is that one-size-fits-all political litmus tests don’t work. So, as much as I embrace the spirit of the Tea Party movement, I don’t want to see it hindering Republicans from regaining control of the House and Senate in 2010. I don’t want to see the Democrats winning elections next November because right-wing voters have been divided and thus conquered.
I very much wish to see the most conservative candidates winning primary elections, but if it happens that moderates win in June, I’d hate to see any conservatives sitting home in November, nursing their piques while liberals high-five each other.
To a certain extent, we must make allowances for geographical differences. A Republican in the northeast is not going to be a clone of one in the southwest. Not if he or she expects to be elected. I am delighted that Scott Brown deprived Obama of his magical 60th vote, but not in my wildest dreams do I expect Sen. Brown to be as staunch a conservative as, say, John Cornyn.
The main order of business next November should be electing people dedicated to undoing all the dangerous mischief that Obama, Pelosi and Reid, have done. In fact, at the 2012 national convention, along with honoring Abe Lincoln and Ronald Reagan, I think the RNC should pay a special tribute to Barack Obama for having done so much to unite the party. The fact is, after the 2008 elections, it appeared that the GOP was ready to go the way of the Whigs, the Bull Moosers and the dodo bird.
On a personal note, I was recently gratified to find one of my quotes being widely disseminated on the Internet. It was the line about the last time that most people have encountered the likes of three women such as California’s Barbara Boxer, Dianne Feinstein and Nancy Pelosi, was when the curtain went up on “Macbeth.”
Those words did appear in an article I wrote a while back, “The New and Improved Iron Curtain,” but, just to set the record straight, the article did not appear in the L.A. Times. Although I did write a humor column for the Times for 11 years, the relationship ended in 1978. These days, the rag exists mainly as a propaganda machine for Obama. They won’t even run my letters to the editor, let alone my articles.
Also, on a personal note, I wish to announce that I plan to run for president or at least vice-president in 2012. I always knew that one of the best ways for a conservative to get a book published and sold was to host a radio or TV show, but not only don’t I have my own show, but nobody who does have one, aside from San Francisco’s Lee Rodgers, seems the least bit inclined to have me on as a guest.
The other way to get on the Best Seller lists is to be a former president. But I didn’t want to be a politician and have to spend my life hanging around people like Charles Rangel, Robert Byrd, Arlen Specter, Barbara Lee or Henry Waxman. Would you? It’s one thing, after all, to sacrifice your life for America, as members of our military do every day, but quite another to sacrifice your sanity.
But when I saw how many copies of “Going Rogue” Sarah Palin sold compared to my shorter, wittier and far more readable “Liberals: America’s Termites (or It’s a Shame That Liberals, Unlike Hamsters, Never Eat Their Young)” I realized I wouldn’t actually have to win an election; I’d merely have to run.
Getting back to my second favorite subject – namely, liberals – doesn’t it seem odd that left-wing big wigs keep getting their political ambitions caught in their zippers? A short list includes Gary Hart, Bill Clinton, Jesse Jackson and John Edwards. Even Jimmy Carter embarrassed himself in a Playboy interview by announcing that at times he had had lust in his heart. Of course only a sanctimonious phony like Carter would suggest that lust lurks in the heart when everyone knows that it’s love that resides in that particular organ. Lust, as even a dunce like Carter should know, hangs out in the lower regions.
Unlike his left-wing cronies, apparently Al Gore only lusts after money, adoration and cheeseburgers.
Finally, we should all acknowledge that people can manage to live exemplary lives without being religiously observant. But when one looks back over the past several months, a period that includes the elections in New Jersey, Virginia and Massachusetts, along with the passing of Ted Kennedy and John Murtha, it’s pretty tough for any honest conservative to deny that God not only exists, but that He’s been working overtime.