The Gipper: “The Founding Fathers knew a government can’t control the economy without controlling people. And they knew when a government sets out to do that, it must use force and coercion to achieve its purpose. So we have come to a time for choosing.”

Under control? “North Korea has never been left unattended to, not for one day. … [T]hat premise is absolutely inaccurate, it’s without foundation.” —John Kerry, who’s more worried about the global thermometer than rogue nations with nuclear weapons

Demo-gogues: “[T]here are neighborhoods around the country where it is easier for a 12- or 13-year-old to purchase a gun, and cheaper, than it is for them to get a book.” —Barack Obama

The BIG Lie: “Seven years ago, the American auto industry was on the brink of collapse. … Some said it was too late to turn things around. But I refused to turn my back on so many of the workers that I’d met. … Our plan wasn’t popular. Critics said it was a ‘road to socialism,’ or a ‘disaster’ waiting to happen. But I’d make that bet again any day of the week. Because today, the American auto industry is back.” —Barack Obama, taking credit where it isn’t due

Braying Jenny: “American women are there scratching their heads thinking why do the Republican leadership hate us so much? Why is it they want to take away our rights? Why is it they want to take away the very services that actually protect life? Planned Parenthood protects life by providing more than 900,000 cancer screenings a year, and millions more receive services through Planned Parenthood.” —Rep. Jackie Speier

Non Compos Mentis: “The real question we should be asking is not whether there is something inherently wrong with the refugees, but whether Germany is doing an effective job of integrating them — and if not, whether something can be done to change that.” —New York Times contributor Anna Sauerbrey on the Cologne, Germany, sexual assault epidemic

Late-night humor: “Former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson announced he is running for president as a Libertarian and he supports legalizing marijuana. You can tell he’s pro-marijuana, because he was supposed to announce he’s running four months ago."—Conan O'Brien