Insight: “Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victim may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron’s cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated, but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.” —C. S. Lewis (1898-1963)

Alpha Jackass: “Look, if anybody still wants to dispute the science around climate change, have at it. You will be pretty lonely because you’ll be debating our military, most of America’s business leaders, the majority of the American people, almost the entire scientific community, and 200 nations around the world who agree it’s a problem and intend to solve it.” —Barack Obama

The BIG Lie: “Surveys show our standing around the world is higher than when I was elected to this office, and when it comes to every important international issue, people of the world do not look to Beijing or Moscow to lead. They call us. … Now, as someone who begins every day with an intelligence briefing, I know this is a dangerous time. But that’s not primarily because of some looming superpower out there, and it’s certainly not because of diminished American strength.” —Barack Obama

State of the Union rebuttals:

“If everything were as great as [Obama] said it was, two-thirds of the American people wouldn’t say the country is on the wrong track.” —House Speaker Paul Ryan

“This was Obama’s Al Bundy speech, the lowly shoes salesman desperately trying to get everyone to remember that time he scored four touchdowns in the one game.” —Steve Green

“Cut through the rhetoric and the message was the same as ever: If you agree with me, you’re reasonable. It was all so tediously familiar and grating I couldn’t wait for it to end (much like Obama’s presidency).” —Jonah Goldberg

“This was less a State of the Union than it was a state of denial. … [T]he fact that [Ayatollah] Khamenei feels that he is able to seize our ships and seize our sailors indicates the incredible weakness of the Obama-Clinton foreign policy and the fact that bullies and tyrants across the world are not afraid of this president and don’t respect this president.” —Ted Cruz

Late-night humor: “Over the weekend, Bernie Sanders said that if he’s elected, he plans to spend $1 trillion to fight unemployment. When asked what they would do with that kind of money, unemployed people said, ‘Retire!’” —Jimmy Fallon