Satire
91 pieces filed under this topic.
Breaking: Hamas Breaches White House Perimeter
The radical Islamic extremist claimed to have an appointment with the president, provoking a swift response from the Secret Service.
Mamdani Announces Plan to Blame Racism After His Policies Fail
He made sure to prepare a foolproof fallback explanation for the failure of his progressive, socialist agenda.
Mamdani Promises Rent-Free Gulags
"We've never seen kindness like this from a politician before," said one journalist.
People Who Have Been Calling for a Ceasefire for Two Years Denounce Ceasefire
"When we chanted 'CEASEFIRE NOW!' we didn't mean like this."
Logo Update: Democrat Donkey Now Holding Sniper Rifle
The Democratic Party determined adding a sniper rifle to the logo would best depict what the party stands for and who it represents.
Democrats Confused After Seeing Conservatives Hold Weird Molotov Cocktail That Never Explodes
"I could've sworn they were going to do something with those things," said one mainstream media journalist.
10 Jobs Perfect for Those Recently Fired for Hateful Posts
Maybe keep your horrific murder celebrations to a minimum next time.
Democrats Wondering if Maybe They Should Stop Saying the Things Assassins are Having Engraved on Bullets
Though somewhat uneasy about seeing their own quotes engraved on shell casings used by murderers, the Democratic Party is hesitant to rush to conclusions.
World Deemed Unworthy of Charlie Kirk
Kirk was on record as stating that, despite building a massive following and influencing global events, "It's all about Jesus."
'Why Won't Conservatives Give Up Their Guns?' Ask the People Shooting at Them
Democratic leaders expressed dismay that conservatives would continue to refuse to disarm themselves in the face of open, murderous hostility.
7 Radical Ideas to Make Our Cities Safer
If someone stops a violent criminal, don't arrest that person: Whoa. Total game-changer.
Democrats Condemn Stabbing Victims for Inflating Crime Numbers
"If you're going to be stabbed to death, at least make it look like an accident."
Secret Service in Awe as Trump Walks on Moderately Sloped Roof
They requested that Trump make a special appearance at the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center to teach incoming recruits the secret to his amazing feat.
CNN Marks One-Year Anniversary of Trump Falling Down After Loud Popping Noises
"The nation will always remember the startling images of Trump falling over and hitting his ear," said Anderson Cooper.
9 Changes New Prime Minister Will Bring to Canada
The means of maple syrup production will be seized for the proletariat.
MS-13 Added to LGBTQ Acronym
"It's time for MS-13 members to be celebrated for their valuable and important contributions to our world."
Liberals Warn Enforcing Immigration Law Is a Slippery Slope That May Lead to Enforcing Other Laws
"This is a perilous road to go down."
Jasmine Crockett Floats Down Mighty Mississippi to Purchase Fresh Shipment of Mexican Slaves
"If we gon' make the South mighty again, I need more of those Latinos to work the fields."
Protesters Demand Government Waste
"I cannot imagine a world without government waste and I don't want to."
Touching: Libs Spell Out 'Coexist' With Burning Teslas
"These torched cars show how serious we are about tolerance."