The Gipper: “This cold war between great sovereign nations isn’t really a new struggle at all. It is the oldest struggle of human kind, as old as man himself. … [S]ome of us came toe to toe with this enemy this evil force in our own community in Hollywood, and make no mistake about it, this is an evil force. Don’t be deceived because you are not hearing the sound of gunfire, because even so you are fighting for your lives.”

For the record: “It’s an old rejoinder, but a true one, that if you think money buys elections, ask President H. Ross Perot, or President Steve Forbes. Romney built his fortune; John Kerry and John McCain married into theirs, and none of their presidential bids succeeded. Michael Huffington — once Arianna’s husband — spent $28 million in a Senate bid in 1994, the most money ever spent on a non-presidential campaign at that point. He lost. Tom Golisano spent $93 million on three independent gubernatorial campaigns in New York; he never won.” —Jim Geraghty

Braying Jenny: “Service is the rent we pay for living in this great country.” —Hillary Clinton (Freedom isn’t free, but her idea of our nation isn’t freedom.)

Non Compos Mentis: “I am impressed by the quality of his foreign policy.” —Bernie Sanders on Barack Obama’s foreign policy malfeasance

The Biggest Sore Loser: “I only came in second because of the fact that Cruz took a lot of votes away from Carson.” —Donald Trump with a fictitious recounting of the Iowa Caucus

Belly laugh of the week: “[Michelle is] going to want to travel and roam around the world in ways we can’t do when we’re traveling in official capacities.” —Barack Obama

Late-night humor: “During last [week’s] Democratic town hall Hillary Clinton told voters, ‘I never thought I’d be standing on a stage here asking for people to vote for me for president.’ Because she thought she’d already be done being president by now.” —Seth Meyers