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Right Analysis   /   Satire
The Babylon Bee / November 24, 2025

Breaking: Hamas Breaches White House Perimeter

The radical Islamic extremist claimed to have an appointment with the president, provoking a swift response from the Secret Service.

The Babylon Bee / November 5, 2025

Mamdani Announces Plan to Blame Racism After His Policies Fail

He made sure to prepare a foolproof fallback explanation for the failure of his progressive, socialist agenda.

The Babylon Bee / November 4, 2025

Mamdani Promises Rent-Free Gulags

“We’ve never seen kindness like this from a politician before,” said one journalist.

The Babylon Bee / October 14, 2025

People Who Have Been Calling for a Ceasefire for Two Years Denounce Ceasefire

“When we chanted ‘CEASEFIRE NOW!’ we didn’t mean like this.”

The Babylon Bee / September 26, 2025

Logo Update: Democrat Donkey Now Holding Sniper Rifle

The Democratic Party determined adding a sniper rifle to the logo would best depict what the party stands for and who it represents.

The Babylon Bee / September 18, 2025

Democrats Confused After Seeing Conservatives Hold Weird Molotov Cocktail That Never Explodes

“I could’ve sworn they were going to do something with those things,” said one mainstream media journalist.

The Babylon Bee / September 17, 2025

10 Jobs Perfect for Those Recently Fired for Hateful Posts

Maybe keep your horrific murder celebrations to a minimum next time.

The Babylon Bee / September 16, 2025

Democrats Wondering if Maybe They Should Stop Saying the Things Assassins are Having Engraved on Bullets

Though somewhat uneasy about seeing their own quotes engraved on shell casings used by murderers, the Democratic Party is hesitant to rush to conclusions.

The Babylon Bee / September 15, 2025

World Deemed Unworthy of Charlie Kirk

Kirk was on record as stating that, despite building a massive following and influencing global events, “It’s all about Jesus.”

The Babylon Bee / September 12, 2025

‘Why Won’t Conservatives Give Up Their Guns?’ Ask the People Shooting at Them

Democratic leaders expressed dismay that conservatives would continue to refuse to disarm themselves in the face of open, murderous hostility.

The Babylon Bee / September 11, 2025

7 Radical Ideas to Make Our Cities Safer

If someone stops a violent criminal, don’t arrest that person: Whoa. Total game-changer.

The Babylon Bee / September 10, 2025

Democrats Condemn Stabbing Victims for Inflating Crime Numbers

“If you’re going to be stabbed to death, at least make it look like an accident.”

The Babylon Bee / August 6, 2025

Secret Service in Awe as Trump Walks on Moderately Sloped Roof

They requested that Trump make a special appearance at the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center to teach incoming recruits the secret to his amazing feat.

The Babylon Bee / July 14, 2025

CNN Marks One-Year Anniversary of Trump Falling Down After Loud Popping Noises

“The nation will always remember the startling images of Trump falling over and hitting his ear,” said Anderson Cooper.

The Babylon Bee / April 30, 2025

9 Changes New Prime Minister Will Bring to Canada

The means of maple syrup production will be seized for the proletariat.

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